Swapping Places

New feature I'm trying-- you'll see a bit about what I'm listening to and reading at the top of every post. Hope this just makes each post that much more personal! If it's possible I will include links.

On My iPod: High by The Blue Nile

Reading: The Journal Keeper by Phyllis Theroux

There's a song by Kate Bush from the 80's that I have on my ipod. The chorus is, "If I only could, I'd make a deal with God, and I'd get Him to swap places. I'd be running up that road, be running up that hill with no problems."

Ever felt that way? That if we could be in charge there'd be NO PROBLEMS. Every journey we took would be obstacle free. And I used to wonder if it was wrong of Kate Bush to put those lines in her song. To say it out loud, that thing I know I've thought... but didn't think others did. And certainly not something that someone should sing about. You know, so that other people could hear. Nevertheless, I liked the song, and it earned a permanent place on my ipod.

Then the other day I read this gripping line in Ann Voskamp's 1000 Gifts, a book I've vowed to read every year so that the ideals can slowly but surely seep into my skull. I think in 30 or so years (and 30 or so reads) it should be taking root. In the first chapter, Ann writes:

"If it were up to me..." and then the words pound, desperate and hard, "I'd write this story differently."

As I read this line, my brain recalled the chorus of that song. And a connection was made-- not that Kate felt it or I felt it or Ann felt it... but that we all have felt it. That desire to trade places with God and be the one to make decisions, to be in control. That sense that we would do it better is pervasive and enticing, and scary, as Ann goes on to say:

"I regret the words as soon as they leave me. They seem so un-Christian, so unaccepting-- so No, God! I wish I could take them back, comb out their tangled madness, dress them in their calm Sunday best. But they are, released and naked, raw and real, stripped of any theological cliche, my exposed, serrated howl to the throne room."

But the truth doesn't lie in our wild thoughts, our feelings and unreliable emotions. The truth lies in the humble response from her brother in law, who lost two sons:

"Just that maybe... maybe you don't want to change the story, because you don't know what a different ending holds." And Ann writes, "There's a reason I am not writing the story and God is. He knows how it all works out, where it all leads, what it all means. I don't."

The next time I think about swapping places, about getting to write the story, I will remember that profound truth over all-- that I don't know the end. And because of that, I shouldn't get to dicker with the middle. No matter how many times I'm tempted to sing along, to join in with the other voices.

Menu Plans

Here's our menu plan for this week. And I'll share links to recipes as I can.

Grilled Barbecue Pork Chops, Broccoli Cheddar Rice, Corn

Tortilla Chicken Soup topped with cheese, tortilla strips, and sour cream (the link I provided isn't the recipe I use, but it's a good idea of how to make it, step by step)

Chipped Beef on toast, black eyed peas

Baked Chicken Fajitas

Homemade Pizza

Crock Pot Sloppy Joe Sandwiches, Tater Tots and Lima Beans

Pork Tenderloin and gravy, baked potatoes, green beans.
This one's easy-- put the pork tenderloin in the crock pot and sprinkle with pepper and garlic salt. Blend cream of mushroom soup, french onion soup, and golden mushroom soup with a whisk. Pour over and cook all day. Makes a delicious pork tenderloin with gravy to put over your potatoes-- or whatever starch you choose.

Praying One Word

This year I'm praying one word for my children. I got this idea from reading The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson. I struggle with keeping up with long, complicated lists of things to pray for. Kind of like I said earlier this week that I like having one stack of papers in one place-- I like simple. If things get too convoluted I just don't do them-- even if I should, even if I want to. Praying is a good example. I admire you guys that have these fancy prayer journals with all kinds of lists and sub lists and post its and what all. Though I've started things of this nature, what I really do well with is just one thing.

Which is why the idea of selecting a word to pray for my kids for the year really really appealed to me. That I could do. And so, I thought about where each of my kids are and the needs I see in their lives, and picked a word. I also picked a word for my husband. Then I took an index card and wrote each person's name and the word and laid the card on my nightstand so I'd see it when I woke up and when I went to bed. That means that at least twice a day-- sometimes more-- I'm praying those words for these people I love. It's been the single most consistent prayer effort I've ever made. Why? Because it's simple. I can do simple.

I have decided not to share the words here, because they're private for the people they apply to and I want to protect that for my family. But if this idea appeals to you, I challenge you to start thinking about it-- and a word will come. Praying one word has been a great prayer exercise for me. I feel more committed than ever to praying for my family-- and I'm already seeing answers in response to my prayers-- which is the nicest part of all.

Schedule For A Typical Day

People often ask me what a typical day looks like for me. Which is kind of hard to answer because no day is typical-- but in a perfect world, I can tell you what a typical day should look like.

6:30 (am) Wake up. Make green tea and sip while having my quiet time.

7:00 Get kids up. Make lunches and make sure everyone stays on task, eats, and leaves the house with teeth brushed and shoes on.

7:30 Leave for school.

8:00 Arrive home. Eat breakfast. Do household chores-- laundry, dishes, tidy up, one big chore like cleaning a bathroom, mopping the floor, vaccuuming, etc. Start meal in crockpot if dinner plans require that.

9:00 Settle down and answer emails.

10:00 Write.

12:00 Lunch.

2:00 Get on the treadmill. Read a book while walking fast. Sweat.

2:45 Shower and dress

3:15 Get kids from school. Try to absorb shock of ALL THE NOISE that comes with them after quiet day at home.

4:00 Arrive home and supervise snacks and homework. Start dinner, watch children, make helpful suggestions about how to spend any free time. Talk to children about their day. Give directions about after school chores. (Usually I've made a list as things occur to me during the day.)

6:00 Dinner. Assign dinner cleanup chores. Listen to grumbling about child labor laws and the unfairness of it all. Tell them it will make them better wives/husbands and besides I cooked it so I don't have to clean it.

7:00 Baths and any unresolved homework issues.

8:00 Start the bedtime process.

9:00 Watch Cold Case or Law and Order or Castle if it's Monday night. Or read a book. Anything that doesn't require too many brain cells.

10:00 Fall asleep from sheer exhaustion.

As I said, hardly a single day goes by just like this-- but this is what I aim for. I think having something to aim for is good.

My Other Blogs

Every Wednesday I'd love it if you'd venture over to my other blogging home, Southern Belle View. This group blog features some of my favorite women/writers and is a place where we discusss life... from a distinctly Southern perspective. We also do great giveaways! I'll be posting reminders here and I hope many of you will find us over there.

And don't forget about She Reads, where this month we've selected a novel (and writer) I am CRAZY about. Don't miss it... or her!

A One Stack House

Today I wanted to share a quick organizing tip I hit on by accident: Have a one stack house.

What do I mean by that? Glad you asked!

A one stack house means that instead of having a stack of papers in the kitchen, the dining room, your bedroom, the office, and anywhere else that papers tend to collect, consolidate the various stacks into one stack. Literally go around and pick up the stacks-- and make just one.

Then designate a place for that one stack. For me it is my dresser. When the stack starts getting too high, that means it's time to weed it out. About once a week I go through my one stack and make piles of things to be filed, things to be dealt with immediately, and things to throw away. In doing this I stay (somewhat) organized.

I'm not sure why having just one stack makes it easier-- but it has for me. If everything is just in one place then it makes things feel more simple, more streamlined. Try it and see if it helps you!

There's Time

This week I got an email that sent me into a tizzy about a deadline I thought I had. I ran around in a panic for a day, thinking to myself "There's just not time! There's just not time!"

The next day I got an email that reassured me. I'd misunderstood the expectation and discovered that there was, indeed, enough time to do what I needed to do. Panic wasn't necessary. And I'd wasted time on my tizzy. See the irony? I did.

As I processed all of this, I wondered why I never seem to trust that there will be enough time to get things done. Why I stress and worry and lament about my to-do list. As I processed things, this simple phrase echoed in my mind: There's time.

There's time to do the things we're supposed to do. Whether our calendar magically opens up to allow for extra time, or a friend takes our kids unexpectedly, or the deadline gets extended, or the work just simply goes faster than we thought it would, things get done. There's time. Yet I tend to live like there's no time, like I can't trust God to provide exactly the time I need-- Him who lives outside our time, who is unaffected by my crazed scrambling and hand wringing.

"Don't you trust Me by now?" He asks.

So today instead of saying "There's no time!" I'm going to listen to that quiet echo within reassuring me that, yes, there is. I can trust Him to provide my needs.

There's time.

There's money.

There's answers.

There's resources.

There's words.

I just have to ask, and trust, and wait in expectation.

The One Where I Talk About Transparency

First, I read this verse

2 Corinthians 12:6b The Message (MSG)

"I don't want anyone imagining me as anything other than the fool you'd encounter if you saw me on the street or heard me talk."


On the same day, I read this quote from an interview with Debbie Macomber (from her new book One Perfect Word)

"Q. One Perfect Word examines your spiritual development and growth from a deeply personal perspective. In many cases you share excerpts from your journals. In the course of writing this book, how did you feel about sharing such intimate details with your readers?

A. I don't have a problem with sharing my humanness. I am flawed. I want my readers to understand that I am genuine and sincere and far from perfect. When I share my struggles, my weaknesses, with my readers, it helps them know my heart. If they know my heart, then they will recognize my faith and hopefully that will show them the path to God and His love."

I think that's the key-- being real, being transparent, talking about the ugliness that is our humanity sometimes. I'm trying to do more of that here on the blog. Showing who I really am, sharing the stuff that might be easiest to just hide away. Even going so far as to include my own personal journal excerpts here like Debbie did in her book. It feels raw and exposed and weird at times. But it also feels good-- to not hide behind these perfect posts, to not dress up my ugliness and put lipstick on the pig, so to speak. To just say, here's who I am and here's what I'm thinking or struggling with or wondering about-- and not always even arrive at a solution. To just say I'm feeling this, in case you're feeling it too.

Based on what Paul and Debbie had to say, none of us are alone. Maybe like me, that brings you a strange sort of comfort.

The One Where I Find An Old Verse Anew

What's your handicap? Let's face it, we all have one. Or more. Today I was lamenting in my journal about one particular handicap, and the words "My grace is sufficient" came to my mind. So I thought to myself, "Hey, I haven't read that verse in a really long time. Why don't I look it up?" So I did. And then of course I had to write the whole passage in my journal because it was so so so fitting for what I was journaling about.

I love it when that happens. When a verse that's so familiar that you don't even really pay attention to it anymore becomes new and exciting again, speaking to you in a fresh and insightful way as only the Bible can.

Here's the thing. I love the Bible. I love Jesus. I love God. I love that I have the Holy Spirit in me, directing me, speaking to me. I've struggled recently with God's people and some of the things I see around me. But at the end of the day I absolutely don't change on those absolutes in my life. The Word is still my lifeline, my support. Everything may change around me. People may betray me, disappoint me, shock me. I might want to get far far away from their brand of religion. I might feel the sting of rejection, the shame of not measuring up, the pain of just not fitting in. But I always have His comfort as close as that old red leather Bible-- His certainty, His promises-- a personal message that speaks to my heart, cutting through all the junk that vies to crowd it out.

Today the words below were a comfort to me. I needed to be reminded that the very thing I try to rid myself of can be seen as a gift with just a shift in perspective. I needed to remember that God is always, always, always keeping me humble... and dependent. I needed to take those words "My grace is enough, it's all you need" with me throughout the coming day-- replacing the words my flesh wants to say with that truth as many times as it takes.

Read on, and maybe you'll find comfort too.

2 Corinthians 12:7-10
The Message (MSG)

7-10Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn't get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me,

My grace is enough; it's all you need.
My strength comes into its own in your weakness.

Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.

The One Where I Share An Old Fave

This was one of my favorite books when I was little. I would spend hours staring at the pictures, making up stories to go with them. In retrospect, this was a sign of things to come-- but of course I didn't know it at the time. Back then it was just fun. With words.

The other day I got out my old copy for my six year old, who also likes to have fun with words. This afternoon I'm going to show her how I used to make up stories in my head to go with the pictures on each page. I've given her a fabric covered blank book and she takes her writing very seriously. Last night we were going to dinner and she wanted to bring her blank book with her in case she had time while we were waiting for our food. I totally get it. It's always nice to take advantage of unexpected time to write.

Thinking about this book, I wonder how many of us had indicators in early childhood of who we would someday be-- this nurse, this teacher, this decorator, this fashionista. This writer. Taking it a step further, I wonder if we pay attention to those indicators in our children's lives of who this child might someday be. I wonder if we sow into it-- providing them with more of what they love, more of what feeds their soul. It's a serious job-- this launching of people. It takes a lot of paying attention, a lot of listening. I started having fun with words as a little girl. I'm so glad the people in my life made sure I was always surrounded by them.

The One Where I Recap My Weekend

Friday was my 4th child (and second daughter's) birthday. She turned 12. In the car on the way to school that morning I said, "This is your last year before you're officially a teenager."

To which she replied, "Then I wish I could skip it so I could be a teenager now!"

Umm, I think she missed the point. But isn't that how we always are? Wanting to skip over things to get to the next phase instead of savoring where we are, what we have? I'm trying not to be that way-- to stop saying to myself "When I get X done and get to Y, then I'll be happier."

On Friday Curt had to be out of town which was a bummer that he wasn't there for her birthday but I tried to salvage the day by hiring a sitter and going out just the two of us. We had a nice dinner at Panera (at 12 that's fine dining) and then shopped for shoes and a dress for her semi-formal Valentine's dance that's coming up at her school. Can I just say I love Ross? We found a dress AND shoes there for cheap. And she looks adorable. Because it was so inexpensive she also talked me into a package of fuzzy socks and a pair of real Converse low-top tennis shoes (not the Target knock-offs she had before). She was thrilled and that's what birthdays are all about.

Saturday I got brave and took my youngest three out in the rain to get haircuts and run errands. We stopped and had lunch at Burger King. I have to say I haven't been inside a Burger King in years. It hasn't changed. We all had kids meals and I tried to tell myself that it was okay to indulge in the awfulness that is fast food if I only had a kids meal. If I'm wrong, please don't comment and tell me different.

My youngest got her long hair cut into a chin length bob. Now she walks around saying all the time "I love my hair! I look so cute!" Ah, to preserve that self-confidence, that self-esteem. I hate that that's ever going to change. But she has two older sisters so I know it will. Life and lies will conspire to erode that self-confidence and self-esteem. And I'll be there fighting tooth and nail to hold back the tides.

Saturday night Curt got home and we took the birthday girl out for her official birthday dinner. This year we changed up our birthday tradition. I used to make a nice meal of that child's choice for the whole family. But this year I hit upon the fact that it would cost about the same for the two of us to take just that child out to the restaurant of their choice (within reason) and spend some one on one time with that child. So this year we've been doing that and they've all really liked it.

She chose Carrabbas and drank her weight in Shirley Temples. She also tied the stem of the cherry into a knot with her tongue, which is a rite of passage in our family. Afterwards we stopped at Sweet Frog, a local frozen yogurt place, because that's what she asked for and this was her night. Curt and I weren't going to have anything until we walked in and saw that THEY HAD THIN MINT FROZEN YOGURT. We were goners. It was good stuff. When we got home she got her presents-- a curling iron (of her own-- very important in a house with multiple females), a Cake Pop baking set, and a new pair of pajamas. She spent the rest of the night curling her hair and experimenting with looks for her upcoming dance. It hit me that she's officially not a little girl any more. Sniff.

Sunday we didn't go to church because Curt was sick (he forced himself to go out for her dinner since he missed her actual day) and no one wanted to sit beside him in church with his hacking, coughing self. I could've taken the kids to church alone but after being alone with them during the week I just didn't have it in me. He barricaded himself upstairs in our bonus roomwhere his hacking could be heard throughout the house in spite of the closed door. I read, wrote, organized my recipes and piddled. A nice day all in all. Sometimes it's nice to just spend a Sunday that way. I will admit publicly here that I still made a to-do list. On a Sunday. I realize I have issues and I'm working on them.

Today the kids have off from school and the birthday girl has her party with friends. (A word on friend parties-- we only do them every other year. A wise friend gave me that suggestion years ago and I am SO GLAD I started it. I think I would stress right out the door if I had to throw six birthday parties every single year, especially considering that four of our six are in July/August/September.) Anyway, this is her year to have a party. We won a limo package in a raffle at her school so we are using that. The limo is picking her and 9 of her friends up at our house and taking them to a local restaurant for a nice dinner, cake, ice cream and presents. Then the limo will drive them all home. Should be fun. She's excited about it... and that's what counts. And mom? She's excited for all the birthday hoopla to be behind us. See? There I go, doing it again.

If I get my ducks in a row I will post some photos from the party this week. Hope you have a great Monday and a wonderful week!

Sunday Supper

Baked Chicken and Rice (doesn't that just sound like a Sunday supper? Comfort food at its best.)

3/4 cup of rice
1 pkg Lipton Onion Soup mix
1 can cream of chicken soup
2 pounds boneless, skinless chicken breasts
2 cups water

Preheat oven to 350. Put rice in ungreased 9X13 baking dish. Place chicken breasts on top of rice. Mix soup and water and pour over top of chicken. Sprinkle with onion soup mix. Cover with foil and bake for 1 hour, or until chicken is done.

I serve this with baby peas.

The One Where I Ease Up On Myself... Or Try To

Recently I read this interview on a writing blog and the author's answer grabbed me. Read it below and then I'll tell you why:

What time of day do you love best?

I’m a morning person. Not one of those productive morning people who write pages and pages before dawn, or who are out running before it’s fully light. But I love getting up early and taking my dog to the park across the street, just wandering around before the rest of the world gets busy. It’s probably the only time of day where my mind has a chance to remain quiet, and there’s no better way to wake up.

(Quoted from this interview.)

When I read the question "What time of day do you love best?" I thought I knew the way she was going to answer-- the kind of answer she was going to give. I thought that, because she is a published writer she would give the answer I was used to getting-- one that exuded her own capability and key to productivity. No matter whether she was a morning or night person-- or somewhere in the middle-- she would talk about how productive she was at those times. So I read her answer with expectation of the same old response. Perhaps I would learn something to apply in my own life!

But as you read, that wasn't what she said. While she is a morning person, she didn't wax eloquent about how she gets so much done in her best time of day. She didn't talk about her coffee routine, her proclivity towards writing a certain amount by a certain time, her schedule for answering emails or tackling social media. Instead she talked about wandering around in the park with her dog, waking up slowly and letting her creativity awaken as well.

I didn't know that was allowed.

And then I asked myself a question: Why do I need permission to wander? Why are my expectations of myself so high that I set schedules and goals and live by to-do lists and calendars, checkmarks and bullet points and long lines of black ink crossing off words? Why isn't it okay to use my best time of day to do... nothing?

I'm not sure I have any answers just yet. It's more something I'm thinking about. Sometimes I have to remember to be kind to myself. Sometimes I just need permission to wander. It's occurred to me that no one is going to come along and give it to me except me. And God, who is rich in mercy and is not up there keeping a stopwatch, shutting it off in disgust when I don't "make time." Whatever that is. I think that He rather likes this thought pattern of mine-- this idea that it's okay to wander, to wake up slowly, to take time to savor, to use my best time of day to do nothing more than to walk around and marvel at life itself, giving myself time to feel His love and soak it right up. I think He eased up on me a long time ago. He's just been waiting on me to ease up on myself. He wrote me a permission slip to wander with no date scrawled across the top. It's redeemable whenever I choose. I think I'm going to choose now.

The One Where I Give You Recipes To Make Desserts You Shouldn't Eat

I love to make desserts for my family-- and they love it when I do. Yes, it is a test of my willpower. But then I remember those nights when we would finish dinner and my mom would reveal that there was dessert. No more magical words have ever been spoken. "I love you" are three powerful words to a child, but "there is dessert" are a close, close second.

So I try to make dessert at least once a week. And I thought you all might want to see the ones I've flagged as "to be tried." Soon.

Butterfinger Blondies (These not only involve Butterfingers, they also involve an amazing substance called "Butterfinger Buttercream." Oh, the deliciousness!)

Mint Chocolate Chip Cookies

Sugar Cookie Bars (These are wonderful because they include the icing that goes on top of a sugar cookie, yet don't involve the standing and cutting out cookies process that makes one crazy.)

The One Where I Give You A Week's Worth Of Meal Links

I am a big believer in making a menu plan, making a grocery list, getting all the shopping done, and then just knowing what your meals are going to be for the week. The whole "think once and write it down" thing really works in this case. I think once and then I don't have to think about what's for dinner again for the rest of the week! Voila! (Does anyone else get a kick out of when people put "Viola" instead of "Voila"? Anyone? Ok, it's just me...)

Back to the meals. I've been looking at making these meals this week so I thought I'd share them with you, in case you wanted to print them out, or write them down if you're a printer ink cheapskate like me, or just bookmark them on your fancy pants ipad or whatever way would serve you best. The point is to scan through the list of ingredients, write down what you need, then go to the grocery store and buy whatever it is. Once all the groceries are in the house and the meals are all listed, all you have left to do is cook it. (And these recipes are easy so the "just cook it" part should not cause your heart to palpitate.) Your work is nearly done! It really is a good feeling. That organized-perfect-for-just-a-moment-this-house-really-is-my-domain feeling.

Savor it. Because it lasts all of 2.5 seconds.

Ok, so here's the links to five meals. That's a whole week of hot and hearty meals that your family can gather around the table and eat together, just like in the commercials on tv.

Pizza Casserole

Slow Cooker Cilantro Lime Chicken

Olive Garden Pasta Fagioli Soup (Scroll down to get to the soup recipe. This post also features their salad and breadstick recipes if you are feeling especially ambitious. I almost never am.)

Crock Pot Chicken And Dumplings (Already made this. The reviews were mixed. The ones who loved it, LOVED it. The ones who didn't... aren't fans of dumplings.)

Baked Fried Chicken Breasts (Already made this. My family raved. Raved, I tell you.)


Are you inspired to make a menu plan? I hope so! Let me know how it turns out!

The One Where I Reveal How I Keep Up With Blogs I Love

I subscribe to them.

I realize this is not rocket science. However, this has been kind of a big deal for me. Long about December (anyone else hearing the Counting Crows song in their head right now? I love that Courteney Cox is in that video. But I digress...)

Will try this again. Long about December, I started thinking about all the blog posts I miss by my fave writers because I don't remember to go check their blogs. And I felt like there had to be a way to fix that. Because mostly in life there is a way to fix something that's bothering you, if you look for it.

And that's when I started subscribing to blogs I love via the feature that sends the post right to your email. And I realize you all have lots of ways that you follow blogs and this is probably old info for most of you. Know this: I am usually hopelessly behind the times. So getting blog posts sent to email probably sounds antiquated to you Google Reader Feeblitz uber cool app techie types. But for me, it was the perfect way to get the latest from the people I want to hear the latest from. And so I went through the novelists I love, the book bloggers I love, the lifestyle bloggers I love, etc. and I signed up for their blogs to come to my emails. And yes I now get more emails than I used to. But there's always the delete button if that particular post doesn't grab me.

And so in this new year I'm feeling just a little more informed, just a little more up to speed with the things I care about. It's not politics. It's not celebs. It's not fashion. (Sorry Shari Braendel). It's not current events. Though it might be for you. For me it's the craft of writing, the pursuit of the perfect meal, the heartbeat of what it means to find faith in the midst of the craziness. These things cast light on the path I am on.

I'm glad I'm not missing these folks' words of wisdom anymore. It's made my life just a little bit richer. And who can't use that?

The One Where I Give Away A Copy Of Small Space Organizing

I think that no matter how big your house is, your ears probably perked up when you saw the title of the book: Small Space Organizing. It reminds me of the old George Carlin routine about our stuff taking up so much space that we need more space for our stuff.

So, if you have small space issues and you want to be more organized. (New Year's Resolutions, any one?) This book is worth checking out. Here's a video you can watch!

And the good news is, I am giving one away! Just leave a comment here and tell me what small space you'd like to organize for a chance to win.

COMMENTS FOR THIS POST ARE NOW CLOSED. THE WINNER IS ANDRESA. ANDRESA, PLEASE EMAIL ME WITH YOUR ADDRESS SO I CAN GET THE BOOK SENT OUT TO YOU!! CONGRATS!!

The One Where I Quote Therese Walsh

I’m going to sound like a NIKE commercial: Just do it. Write. Because really, what is the option? To stop? If you stop, you’ll feel depressed; it’s what writers do best. If you continue to write, you may still feel uninspired and even depressed, but because you’re working there’s at least a hope for that light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. For writers, hope is everything, isn’t it? We hope we can finish the book. We hope that what we have to say is worth saying, worth hearing. And we hope—hope, hope, hope—to find an audience that appreciates the work. Not writing risks all that hope. I sometimes have to remind myself of that.

(This is from an interview with Therese Walsh, creator of the site Writer Unboxed, and author of The Last Will of Moira Leahy. To see the interview in its entirety, visit Womens Fiction Writers.)

The One Where I Quote Tamar Cohen

This quote was from this post:


Don't worry about who could possibly be interested in what you have to say. People read looking for some insight on what it is to be human. You’re human, therefore you have as much right to write it as anyone else.

The One Where I Say More About The Blog's New Direction

This quote further talks about what I think I need to do with my blog from here on out:

…here’s the secret I wish someone had told me back when I would get apologetic
for being a “web diarist” or an “online journaller” or a “crazy person who
writes about herself on the internet”: when you’re really liking what you’re
writing, and you’re having fun doing it? That’s probably because you’ve found
your voice. You’ve found your connection with the words and the stories. There’s
an audience out there hungry for someone who knows how to use her voice. Don’t
stifle it because you think you’re supposed to be… what?

(quote came from this post)

I want to like what I'm writing. I want to have fun with it. I want my voice to come through again-- not some voice that sounds like I think I'm supposed to sound because it's what I somehow became convinced I was supposed to sound like. I don't want my blog to be safe, and I am afeared that that's what it's been for quite some time now. Safe. Don't rock the boat. Don't offend anyone. Don't say what I'm really thinking because someone might not buy my books any more. Just write my little banal, milquetoast posts within these banal milquetoast parameters that will contribute continuous content (ah, alliteration I do love you so) without ruffling feathers.

So this is me, stopping all that. I might post three times in one day if three amazing things pop into my brain and I've got that kind of time. And I might go silent for a bit if nothing remarkable presents itself. Or I get real busy. Cause that happens more than I like.

And yes, I do plan to continue these Friends-style titles. Because I like 'em. They make me smile. And I hope they will make you smile and not eventually bore you to tears. Because once I thought that my clever little categories for each day was GENIUS. So clearly, things change.

Oh, and I will make you one more promise. I will try to make each post short. Brief quotes. Links to good stuff. Things like that. I will refrain from pontificating unless it's just absolutely necessary. Because none of us have that kind of time or inclination. We have shorter attention spans now, haven't you heard? But know this, if I post it, it's because it matters to me. And I hope it matters to you.

The One Where I Admit That I Dislike My Blog

I was seriously about to break up with my blog. Put up a last post and say "It's been real. See ya on the flip side."

You see, me and the blog took a break from each other over Christmas and it turned out that I liked the break. I liked it a little too much. I liked not thinking about whether the blog was getting comments I needed to respond to. Or whether the blog needed updating. Or whether the blog had a broken link. Or whether I'd written this post for this certain day and-- oh my-- would the world stop turning if my Thursday Thought wasn't there by 6am?? Or whether the blog was in some other state of need that ate up my time and left me grumpy and unfulfilled.

But I'd promised the blog that I would come back after the break. And because I always try to keep my word, I came back. And you all read the posts I dutifully put up last week when I came back. You even read my clever idea about going through a book that was very New-Yearsy in subject matter. You might've even bought said book and eagerly anticipated going through it here each week.

Somehow along the way my blog went from passion to production. I wasn't getting on here because I couldn't wait to share something with you (the way I started). I was getting on here because I said I would. And because I'm a writer and we writers are expected to develop "an audience." But somehow, in trying to develop my audience like a good little writer, I started boring myself-- and probably you guys-- to tears.

But not any more. I hereby declare there will be no more themed days. There will be no more perfunctory posts. (I do love me some alliteration.) There will be no more me writing what I think you want to hear or what I think someone "out there" expects me to say. Instead I'm taking back my blog and making it my own-- less expectation and more passion.

So, my apologies but I won't be discussing that book here after all. I changed my mind because I'm a woman and that's what we do. (Although I do love that book so, truly, you should read it and be inspired.) I just don't love the idea of robotically showing up week after week to discuss it, making something I love become something I'm working on. Again with the boredom.

Instead I will be talking about my life and my friends and what I think about food and writing and reading great books and how my faith impacts all the different little tributaries of my life. And I'll be talking about marriage and kids and family and how most of the time I feel like a great big failure at all of it. But I try. I get up every day and I try. Mostly I just bake them stuff because that seems to make them happy. So I'll share the recipes and you can try the same tactic.

I'll be talking about all of that. And probably more. But I can't promise it'll be Monday through Friday. And I can't promise you'll always like what I have to say, or the way I say it. But instead of this manufactured, mass-produced product, what I share here will be one-of-a-kind: handmade, with love.

Those are the things I like best anyway. I hope you do, too.

Fiction Friday: Theme

This post is from a newsletter article by Holly Lisle, who made me think about theme in a different way by challenging me to make it personal-- what themes have I dealt with in my own life that can be reflected in my fiction? Read on...

It goes without saying that every story is about something, doesn't
it?

Well, you'd think so, but in fact, NOTHING goes without saying.
All information is new to someone once, and if you haven't heard
this before (and maybe even if you have but you sort of forgot why
it mattered), let me say this now:

In order to matter to your reader, your story has to be ABOUT
something that matters to your reader...

...Want your readers to love your characters and your stories and come
back for more, not because you said a whole lot of nothing in a
very pretty fashion, but because you hooked them and showed them
someone they loved in a situation that mattered doing things they
cared about?...

...You must tell a story that shows people and
life not as the are, but as they could be, and as they should be.

To do that, first YOU have to care.

And for you to care, you have to be telling a story about something
that matters to you.

What matters to you?

That justice can overcome corruption?

That love is the most powerful force in the world?

That best friends can survive any hardship together?

That fear is what turns men into animals?

Sit down right now, give a good hard look at your own life, and
establish a few themes that sum you up. That make sense of the
life you have lived to this point.

Consider whether those themes are what you want to hold up as
examples, or whether they're what you want to show a hero
overcoming.

With a theme as your anchor, you can then plot a story that will
matter to you when you write it...and that will matter to your reader
when he reads it.

Thursday Thought: Unsent Letters

When you get mad what do you do? Call your mom and vent to her? Wait til your husband gets home and tell him all about it? Tell your best friend? Hash it out internally, practicing all your best put-downs as you imagine the conversation you would have with the offending party?
One thing I've recently hit on is writing the person an email you never intend to send. Open up your compose screen and start writing. Say it all. Get it out. Tell them just what you think, how you feel, and your version of what happened. Vent.

But for goodness sake, do not put their name in the recipient's box. Don't want that puppy getting accidentally sent out, do you? Of course not. The letter, you see, isn't really meant for them. It's meant for you. Your feelings are valid. Your emotions need to work their way out. Repressing and ignoring them isn't going to help. This gives you a safe place to work through it all. You can be as ugly as you need to be, this isn't the time for censoring yourself. You can even cuss if you want to.
After you've written your letter, hit "save draft" and let it stew in your inbox for a few days. Then go back and read it, and be glad that you didn't send that email. Because in a few days you've calmed down. You've had a chance to maybe see the other side of things. You've processed it and a cooler head has prevailed. Most likely you'll just delete the dumb thing, shaking your head at what a difference a day or two can make.

We all get angry, we all get wronged, we all struggle to put things in perspective at times. And when we do it's nice to have something to do with all those feelings. Next time you're struggling with something, try the unsent letter option. You might find it gives you a place to work out all that hurt, without hurting anyone else.

The holidays are notoriously a time for hurt feelings. The increased exposure to family, the party invites and spending stress, the busy schedules can all bring things to the surface. If you've got a bone to pick with someone, try this method. It just might help you not say something you ordinarily would. It might just save a relationship and your reputation.

Say it. Just don't say it directly to them.

Psalms For Moms

Psalm 25:9, "He gives the rejects His hand, and leads them step by step." (MSG)

Over Christmas several of my friends and I joked that we belonged on the Island of Misfit Toys. Ever feel like a misfit? I do. All the time. I don't fit with the uber-Christians and I don't fit with the heathens. I don't fit with the fashionistas and I don't fit with the slobs. I don't fit with the secular writers and I don't fit with the Christian writers. Whenever I take one of those personality tests, I never fit in one particular category. I took one online and discovered I scored in a category that is 1% of the population. The test said it's the most rare personality type. Consequently, I've never been able to proudly proclaim "I'm a Golden Retriever! I'm an Otter! I'm a Phlegmatic! I'm a Choleric!" Instead I've spent a lot of time trying to figure myself out. The lines, they do keep blurring.

And yet, I'm okay with that. I've embraced my one-size-does-not-fit-all life. I like my uniqueness. Sure it would be simpler to pick out a label and proudly wear it affixed to my chest so that everyone knows what they're dealing with. But that's not going to happen. So that's why I picked out today's verse. It spoke to me, as a misfit. The fact that God made me just as I am. That He takes delight in my misfit ways. Even more, He gives me His hand and leads me step-by-step.

Perhaps you needed to remember that He's there for you today. You might feel rejected-- like you don't fit. But you fit: your small hand in His large, capable one, picking your way out along the jagged, rocky path of life. Maybe you've got a child who needs to hear this verse today-- a reminder that when we feel like rejects, He is there with His hand outstretched. There is a place for misfits, and that place is by His side, sticking close, letting Him show us the way.

Two For Tuesday (A Fail and a Win)

This year I did one thing right when it came to my reading habit. I started keeping a reading log for the first time ever. This log turned out to be quite informative and fun-- I'd recommend it to anyone who reads a lot and desires to remember all that you've read. Through writing down the books I read I was able to 1) see how many books I read per month on average (5) and 2) remember what I read, and what I thought of each book. In years' past I couldn't tell you any of that info-- it was all a blur. As I flipped back through my log, I was like "Oh, I forgot I read that!" And I was able to see what I thought of the books, as I wrote my own personal review for each book after I read it. I don't intend to publish any of that info here-- it was just something I did for myself, for my own recordkeeping.

So that was my win.

What was my fail?

At the end of 2010 I made a TBR list (To Be Read) for 2011, which I will admit was a bit grandiose. I was dreaming big, clearly. One of the goals I most looked forward to was reading all of Anne Tyler's works over the course of 2011, starting with Dinner At The Homesick Restaurant.

I am confessing here, publicly, that I read NONE of Anne Tyler's novels. Not one. Nada.

Am I including her stuff on my TBR list for 2012? No. Not because I don't still want to read them, but because I want to leave room on my TBR list this year for those serendipitous books out there that I don't know I want to read yet. I want my list to have room to grow. Right now that list is at a doable 25 books (I read around 60 last year.) That gives me much room to grow and change-- because that's what a new year is all about, setting goals, while leaving room for an uncertain future full of growth and change, and the grace to do both.

Speaking of reading, remember you're invited to join me in going through Write It Down, Make It Happen... We'll discuss the first chapter on Thursday, January 12th.

And... We're Back

Hope your holidays were happy! We were busy and crazed and sick and cooped up and... so, so happy. I loved the break that we were all able to have. And yet, there is something equally nice about getting back to routine and a sense of normality. (I say a sense because really there is no normal.)

I briefly announced over Christmas that I'm going to be going through the book Write It Down, Make It Happen as we begin the new year, and I invite you to join me. This book is about something I very much believe-- that setting goals in many areas of your life, and writing them down, is paramount to accomplishing them. I have seen this over and over in my life.

So get yourself a copy and join me in going through it. I will be posting about the book on Thursdays, going through a chapter a week. A perfect thing to do in this new year! This coming Thursday I will just write an introduction to what we're doing and then we'll start with the introduction (because I believe in reading introductions) on January 12th, hopefully giving those of you who want to order it (or download it on your new e-reader!) time to get it and read that first chapter.

I hope that you'll decide to go through the book with me and we will write down our goals-- and see them happen-- together!

Banana Bars

Ever have rapidly darkening bananas and not know what to do with them other than make yet another loaf of banana bread? Well, here's another, tasty, solution. My family loved these! One of my sons even said he wants these for his next birthday instead of cake!

Banana Bars

2 cups all purpose flour

2 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

3/4 cup (1.5 sticks) butter or margarine, softened

2/3 cup granulated sugar

2/3 cup packed brown sugar

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 cup mashed ripe banana (2 bananas)

1 egg

2 cups chocolate chips

Combine flour, baking powder and salt in medium bowl. Beat butter, granulated sugar, brown sugar and vanilla in large mixer bowl until creamy. Beat in bananas and eggs. Gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in chocolate chips. Spread into greased 15X10 inch jelly roll pan.

Bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 20-30 minutes or until cake tester comes out clean. Cool completely before cutting into bars. Makes 6 dozen.

Merry Christmas!

I'm spending time with my family as my husband has some time off work and my kids have some time off school. I will be back January 2nd to start a new year with you!

I'd like to wish all my regular blog readers (and those who drop by) a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Thank you for spending time with me each day via this blog. You bless me with each visit.

Remember that starting January 2nd I am going to be beginning a study of Write It Down, Make It Happen by Harriette Klausner. You can buy it from most any online or retail store and I was even able to find some used copies available. We will be going through a chapter a week. I hope that many of you will leave a comment at this post and let me know you're going to be participating.

I'm excited to come alongside you guys in 2012 as we write down our goals together-- then support each other in making them happen! Until then, eat, drink and be merry... and so, so thankful.

Bonus: Review of War Horse

I got a chance to see War Horse a few weeks ago, but I promised I wouldn't talk about it until today. I wanted to share my thoughts with those of you who may be considering going to see it.

1. The movie is beautiful-- exactly what you would expect from Spielberg.

2. The horse is the star. If you love horses, you'll probably love this movie.

3. The movie is extremely graphic. Spielberg doesn't gloss over the horrors of the battlefield. But there are beautiful moments exemplifying the human spirit even in the face of darkness interspersed throughout-- enough to keep the viewer engaged with the story. As I said to my husband after the movie, "I was surprised there was no love story." He responded, "Well there was a love story-- it was between the boy and his horse."

4. After seeing it, I know why it garnered a PG-13 rating. I will not be taking my children younger than that age to see it. As I said, the horrors of war are presented unflinchingly. Some of the images and themes I feel are a bit much for a young child's emotional state. I'd recommend if you have a teen who loves history, war, battles, and/or horses, send them. There's no sex and hardly any bad language. But there is violence-- not gratuitous, just enough to make the aspects of war very real. If you and your spouse like historical movies, go. As my husband said, it's a good date night movie.

5. Because it's a historical movie, it can be a bit slow. I felt like the dialogue and even the pace of the movie was accurate for the time period the movie takes place in, if that makes sense. Life moved at a slower pace, things were simpler. To truly appreciate the film, I think you need to get in the spirit of that time period and not expect a blockbuster, blow-em-up movie like you see today. It definitely has that epic feel to it. And I can see why there's already Oscar buzz surrounding it.

Below is a summary of the movie. I hope my review helped some of you out there in your decision about whether to see it-- and whether to take your kids.

DreamWorks Pictures’ “War Horse,” director Steven Spielberg’s epic adventure, is a tale of loyalty, hope and tenacity set against a sweeping canvas of rural England and Europe during the First World War. “War Horse” begins with the remarkable friendship between a horse named Joey and a young man called Albert, who tames and trains him. When they are forcefully parted, the film follows the extraordinary journey of the horse as he moves through the war, changing and inspiring the lives of all those he meets—British cavalry, German soldiers, and a French farmer and his granddaughter—before the story reaches its emotional climax in the heart of No Man’s Land.

The First World War is experienced through the journey of this horse—an odyssey of joy and sorrow, passionate friendship and high adventure. “War Horse” is one of the great stories of friendship and war— a successful book, it was turned into a hugely successful international theatrical hit that is currently on Broadway. It now comes to screen in an epic adaptation by one of the great directors in film history.

And if you'd like to see an interview with Spielberg talking about the movie, you can go here: http://youtu.be/kKld9pcOowc (It's quite the interesting interview.)

Fiction Friday: A Writer's Review

This is my last post for December. I am going to take some time to enjoy my family since my husband has time off work and my kids have time off school. I'll be back in the new year to share some new stuff! (And I might be in and out with the occasional missive between now and then.)

And now... on to today's Fiction Friday post!

This post really inspired me. So I thought I'd share it with those of you who would also like to use these last few days of this year to summarize and dissect their writing year. I am posting the questions she asks herself below. Pull out your journal and take some time to conduct your review, then set some new goals as we turn the page on another year. (Can you believe it?!)


What have you written this year?

How have you pushed yourself as a writer? What risks have you taken?

What have you done in terms of professional development this year?

How have you networked with other writers and other industry professionals?

How have you supported other writers? When did you ask for support?

What have you done to prevent burnout? How have you celebrated your accomplishements?

What have you done to nurture your creativity?

How did you promote your work?

What did you do to build your online presence this year?

Did you make any tough choices or do anything truly scary to further your career this year?

If you wrote for free, was that writing supporting another part of your career?

Where did you go to support your career? Conferences, retreats?

What is your biggest accomplishment of the year?

Where did you fall short of your expectations this year?

How much money did you earn? Is that up or down from the year before? How much would you like to earn next year?

What are your goals for your writing career for the coming year?

What’s one thing you can do today towards accomplishing one of those goals?

Thursday Thought: Be So Good They Can't Ignore You

I love Steve Martin. When I say I loved his memoir Born Standing Up, I am not gushing randomly... I truly loved it. It's one of those books that still makes me smile when I run across it. It was a reading experience. Bonus: I listened to it on audio, and he read it, so it was even better hearing it from him.

So I was delighted to run across this post referring to the book, dissecting one of the points Steve (I call him Steve) made ("Be so good they can't ignore you"), and showing all of us how we can apply this principle in our lives. I thought I'd direct you to the post in case you'd like to read it.

This got me thinking further about what it means to be the best in your field-- whatever your field may be. And it solidified something I've been thinking about doing in the month of December. (And maybe January depending on how December goes.)

I've taken this month to devote intentional time to getting better at writing. That means actually reading the books I've bought on writing. It means taking an online class I've signed up for on food writing, as I've got an idea that would involve history and food and I need help to make that idea a reality. It means evaluating where I'm at in my writing and setting some goals for where I want to go. I'm at a good point to do that as I've just turned in the edits on my next novel and don't have to start the next one right this minute. (Though you can bet I'm still jotting down notes and allowing the elements of this story to emerge. This is my favorite part of writing a novel so I'm savoring it.)

As the year wraps up and another one begins, it's a perfect opportunity to set aside intentional time to get better at what you're doing, whatever that may be. If it's being a homemaker, maybe it's time that you'll read some books on cleaning, organizing, cooking, etc. If it's being a mom, maybe it's time to read that parenting book you bought but never got around to reading, or time to plan crafts or purchase board games or whatever it is that's been nagging at you to do with your kids. If it's being a better steward with your money, maybe it means finally creating that budget, learning to use coupons to save money, finding websites that teach you how to save/shop/menu plan. If it's being a better follower of Christ, maybe it's time to finally create that prayer journal, read that spiritual growth book, ask that person to hold you accountable, etc. Whatever you do, the point is to set aside the distractions that keep you from making the effort to become better.

I liked what Michael Hyatt had to say about this idea in this post.

Psalms For Moms

Psalm 101:8
"Every morning I will put to silence all the wicked in the land..."

Every morning. (Before I start my day-- before I let all the voices start talking inside and outside of my head)

I will. (I have to make the effort.)

Put to silence. (Stop the noise.)

All the wicked. (Now this might be a stretch because when you think "wicked" you might think evil or bad or... whatever connotation that word means to you. But bear with me. There's some wicked stuff going on inside our heads. Stuff we tell ourselves. Words we replay in our heads that other people have said to us. Bad things that have happened to us or people we love.)

In the land. (Within my sphere of influence, my community, my workplace, my home. Everybody's land looks different.)

King David may have meant something different when he wrote this verse. He may have meant that he was going to arrest or kill the wicked in Israel. But I think this verse can still apply to those of us who are not kings. Every morning we can put to silence all the wicked in the land-- we can make the effort to seek truth and to live by it, to silence all the lies we tell ourselves, and the lies we've been told by others. It takes effort. It takes intention. It takes awareness. It takes faith. It takes creating silence, and then letting God fill that silence with His voice.

Two For Tuesday: 2 Goodies To Make!

One of my favorite things to do at Christmas is make a variety of treats, package them, and take them to neighbors and friends. It's a nice, reasonably inexpensive way to say "I'm thinking of you at Christmas."

This year I am planning to make these:

No Bake Oreo Truffles (I did make these for a cookie exchange-- they're pictured above-- I added my own twist by sprinkling them with peppermint chips! Pretty!)

Pecan Pie Bars

Perhaps you'd like to, too!

Making Christmas Sweeter

I've got Christmas goodies on the brain this week-- will be sharing two links tomorrow for easy goodies you can make. This week I am hoping to get into Christmas baking after clearing off my to-do list enough to do so. I want to make some old faves and new ones, too. On the list will be peanut butter bars and M&M cookies and peppermint bark. And I think I might have to make the Vanilla Peppermint cake pictured above, inspired by Southern Lady magazine. The peppermint glaze recipe is listed below but I am going to do a different, easier vanilla cake, probably from the pages of my Cake Mix Doctor cookbook.

But seriously, isn't that so pretty? I think pulling this out for dessert after dinner one night would make Christmastime even sweeter. Does anyone else just love this time of year??

Here's the glaze:

PEPPERMINT GLAZE
Makes approximately 1 1/2 cups

1 1/2 cups confectioners’ sugar
3 tablespoons whole milk
1/2 teaspoon peppermint extract

1. In a small bowl, whisk together confectioners’ sugar, milk, and peppermint extract until smooth. Use immediately.

PS. I made the cake last night-- I made chocolate chocolate chip cake and topped it with the peppermint glaze and crushed peppermint chips. I served it with a scoop of Edy's Peppermint ice cream on the side. I ate my slice while watching one of my favorite Christmas movies-- ahhh.

Fiction Friday: Pick Yourself! A Guest Post

A few Fridays ago, we heard from Mary DeMuth about dreams that might look dead but are just nesting. Well this Friday, she's back with more wisdom! This time the wisdom she's sharing is about no longer being a wallflower at a junior high dance. Who among us has good, positive memories of junior high dances? Anyone? Anyone? I do not. Ok, except for the music which was uh-mazing. But we're not here to talk about my love of 80's music.

I remember reading a blog post by Seth Godin that talked about picking yourself instead of waiting to be picked. He was referring to the world of ebooks and self publishing. As I read Mary's post, I thought of how both of them are essentially saying the same thing. Maybe your answer is not ebooks or self publishing. Maybe your answer is to get off the wall and join the dance at all-- write that first scene, tell that trusted friend that you're going to finally write that novel and ask him or her to hold you accountable. The point isn't what your next step is-- because that looks different for everyone. The point is to simply join the dance. Read on...


I remember the buzz in my stomach, that insistence that everything inside of me screamed nerves. I entered the cafeteria feeling the weight of my loneliness. I scanned the streamered room, searching for a friendly face, hoping I'd spy a friend. I did.

We stood together, alone with our thoughts, as the music blared from a DJ. We talked in nervous jitters. I scanned the room, wondering. Would I be asked to dance?

The answer would come two awkward hours later.

No.

I don't know about you, but I think hell is like junior high dances for wallflowers. Isolating. Humiliating. Awkward.

Problem is, I've carried the experience with me into adulthood. How often I feel like I'm lining the wall of life, waiting for someone or some opportunity to find me, grab my hand, and pull me out into life's limelight.

It's only been recently that I realized that life is not meant to be a junior high dance. We aren't suppose to live sidelined, afraid, insecure. We are encouraged to live uncaged, to soar, to engage in life. To do so means risk.

In high school, I abandoned the silly rules of dances. I took a risk. Instead of waiting, my friends and I chose to venture to the middle of the dance floor and dance like crazy people. The contrast between the junior high dance and the high school dance is the contrast to the life God's wants us to live today. To be unafraid. To be innovative and spunky and fun and alive. To grab the hands of our friends, shun the so-called rules, and engage in life to the fullest.

That's what I want for me.

That's what I want for you.

I want you to dance.

You can find more of Mary's wisdom at http://www.marydemuth.com/

Thursday Thought: Jumping Fences

"I don't understand why Maverick does that," my 11yo daughter exclaimed as we watched our dog jump our fence and run into the neighbor's yard. "He's got the best yard of any yard around here, yet he always goes to the other yards. Why can't he just be happy where he is?"

A spiritual lesson if I've ever heard one.

That day in the kitchen, on the heels of her question, so many images came to my mind:

The person who has it all yet strays into another relationship.

The person who has a beautiful home yet longs for another one.

The person who has enough yet goes into debt to get more.

The person who has accomplished so much but still wants more.

The person who has the ability to walk and good health, but is still dissatisfied with their body.

Me.

You.

We have the most beautiful yard but we fight this urge to jump into the other ones. Maybe we don't leap over the fence. We might just stand safely behind it and just stare longingly, telling ourselves that's ok. We want and we want and we want. And we forget to notice where we are. The beautiful children. The husband or wife we chose. The job that pays. The roof over our heads. So much beauty around us and we look right past it.

This is a season of want. A season of shopping trips and wish lists. A season of looking into other yards. And in the midst of that season I think it's important to remember-- as hard as it may be in your situation-- that we are where we are for a purpose, by God's design (the One who makes me who I am-- see below). God put you in your yard, beautiful as it is. The best yard around for you. The trick is to stay inside our fence and look towards making our little corner of the world as beautiful and blessed as possible for as long as we're there. To follow Paul's words below...

"I've learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I'm just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I've found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am." Phillipians 4: 11-13 (MSG)

Psalms For Moms

"I'm doing the very best I can, and I'm doing it at home, where it counts." Psalm 101:2b (MSG)

This verse jumped out at me when I read it in the Message version. (FYI: the NIV version is "I will walk in my house with blameless heart." I always like to hold up the NIV against the Message, as sometimes the two can be quite different. But in this case, it's close enough. And I love the way the Message communicates this truth.)

For the last several weeks I've had to be out of my house a lot as the deadline for my next book edits approached. And this absence only proved something I already knew. My home-- my family-- needs me. Not a sitter. Not the older kids holding down the fort. Not even the daddy of the family handling things. My family needs ME. (Curt does a great job when I have to be gone but he'd be the first to tell you he can't-- and wouldn't want to-- do my job.)

As today's Psalm says, what I do at home counts. It counts when I sit and listen to my kids' stories about their day. It counts when I make a meal that we can all sit down to. It counts when I remember to buy their favorite cereal or cookie or brand of chips. It counts when I make sure there's toilet paper. It counts when I fold the laundry (though I do make them put it away). It counts when I fill out the forms for school and check up on the projects that are due. It counts when I take them to the library. It counts when I show up at their school events. It counts when I stop and put a bandaid on a booboo. It counts when I am... there.

Sure writing books is fun. Going to author events is fun. I'm living my childhood dream and I am so blessed to be able to do so. But one thing I can't forget in living that out is that I had another childhood dream... and that was to be married, to have children, to create a home. I can't give up on one dream in the name of pursuing another. And to be sure, if I had to lay down one in the name of the other, I would choose home every time. Because while living the writing dream is great-- it can't touch living the wife/mom one.

Maybe today you're feeling like all the little things you do go unnoticed. Like what you do within the walls of your home don't count. But they do. They're essential. They're valuable. You-- the mom-- are valuable. You do things no one else can do. It's no one thing you do. It's everything you do.

Do the very best you can, at home, where it counts. Because oh boy, does it count.

Two For Tuesday: Hot Drinks For The Holidays!

I plan to serve these the first chance I get! (Recipes are linked to the original sites I saw them on in case you want to bookmark them for yourself!)

Hot Caramel Apple Cider

½ gallon apple cider (64 ounces or 8 cups)
½ cup orange juice, fresh-squeezed or good quality
1 orange
8 cloves
2 cinnamon sticks (fresh ones)
¼ teaspoon ground allspice
1/3 cup caramel sauce (or more to your own taste)

Optional: caramel-flavored syrup and sweetened whipped cream (or substitute maple syrup for caramel)

Pour 8 cups of apple cider into a large stock pot on the stove pot. Set heat to medium-high. Add orange juice, cinnamon sticks and allspice. Thoroughly wash your orange and then gently stab the whole cloves into it. If you find it hard to do that without destroying the cloves, use a toothpick to poke a little hole first, then insert the cloves. (If you are doubling the recipe, you can still just use one orange. Just double the number of cloves you poke into it.)

Gently drop the whole orange into the pot.

Bring cider to a boil, then reduce heat to a low simmer. Simmer on low for 60 minutes or longer if you wish. If you’re keeping the pot on the stove for an extended period, keep an eye on the orange. If at any time it splits open, remove it from the pot. If the white pith is exposed it will add a bitter taste to your cider. If you’re going to have the pot warming for hours on end, take out the orange. After you’ve simmered for an hour, add caramel sauce and stir to combine and dissolve. Add more caramel to taste if needed.

When ready to serve, ladle into mugs, top with whipped cream, and give it a drizzle of caramel and a sprinkle of cinnamon.


Peppermint-Mocha Coffee


6 cups freshly brewed MAXWELL HOUSE Coffee
4 squares (1 oz. each) BAKER'S Semi-Sweet Chocolate
1-1/2 cups hot milk
1 tsp. peppermint extract
8 peppermint sticks

POUR coffee into large saucepan. Add chocolate; cook on low heat 5 min. or until chocolate is melted, stirring occasionally.

ADD milk and extract; stir until well blended. Garnish each serving with a peppermint stick.

Easy Holiday Dessert Idea

We had a crazy weekend that involved a lot of running around. And in the middle of that, I had to pull together my husband's birthday celebration. So I thought I'd share what I made for dessert, in case anyone else out there needs a quick and easy and delicious solution for a Christmas party.

Buy an Oreo Crust.

Spoon softened peppermint ice cream into it.

Refreeze.

Serve with hot fudge to pour over each serving.

Sprinkle with peppermint chips or crushed candy canes if you're feeling really adventurous.

Voila! A pretty and festive dessert with NO BAKING INVOLVED.

Saturday Bonus: The Muppets

I blogged about seeing the new Muppets movie and enjoying it-- perhaps some of you have now seen it. For those of you who have, I thought you might enjoy reading these fun facts about the movie. Share them with your kids!

FUN FACTS

BY THE NUMBERS
LUCKY NUMBER SEVEN -- Disney’s “The Muppets” is the 7th feature film featuring the Muppets.

MANY MUPPETS -- More than 120 Muppets appear in the film.

STEPPIN’ OUT – The film tapped 60 dancers to perform with Jason Segel and Amy Adams for the “Everything’s Great” opening musical performance.
• Hollywood Blvd. was shut down for two evenings to record the finale dance scene of the reprise of “Everything’s Great,” featuring 100 dancers.

PRETTY PIG -- A total of 12 different costumes were made for Miss Piggy—more costume changes than any other actor in the film.

SO BIG -- The largest Muppet, Thog, stands over 9.5 feet tall and is 4 feet wide.

TOP TEACHER – Amy Adam’s character Mary is a teacher with 16 students. Thus, no less than 16 perfect apples sit on the edge of the stellar teacher’s desk.


FILMMAKER FRENZY
AT THE HELM -- Director James Bobin makes his film directorial debut. Bobin co-created HBO’s “Flight of the Conchords,” which he wrote, directed and executive produced.

CUE THE MUSIC -- Bret McKenzie of “Flight of the Conchords” wrote and produced three original songs and served as music supervisor for the film.
• McKenzie fills some big shoes: “The Muppet Movie” was nominated for two Oscars®: Best Music, Original Song (“Rainbow Connection”) and Best Music, Original Sound Score.

ALL IN THE FAMILY -- Choreographer Michael Rooney is the son of Mickey Rooney, who appears in the film in a cameo role. This is the first time the two have ever worked together on a film.

MINI ME -- Muppet versions of Gary/Jason Segel and director James Bobin were created.


IT’S ALL ABOUT THE ACCESSORIES
HIGH FASHION -- Miss Piggy had shoes made for her by Christian Louboutin and a dress by Zac Posen, which she wears in the finale scene.

FANCY DUDS -- Kermit had a suit made for him by Brooks Brothers for the scene where he walks through the streets of Paris with Miss Piggy.

TIME WILL TELL -- Walter wears a Kermit watch in the film.

TICKLING THE IVORIES -- Rowlf’s original piano is back—incorporated into the Muppet Show orchestra.

STRUMMING THE SAME STRINGS -- Kermit uses the banjo from 1979’s “The Muppet Movie” during the “Rainbow Connection” performance in Disney’s “The Muppets.”
• The staging of the scene features Kermit on a replica of the log where he was first found strumming his banjo in the very first Muppet movie. Miss Piggy shows up in a rowboat very much like the one the late Dom DeLuise used when he joined Kermit in their sweet duet.


LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION
SEEING GREEN – Disney’s “The Muppets” was a green set (in more ways than one) with an environmental steward who made sure the proper recycling receptacles were utilized on set. All of paper products were made from recycled materials and were compostable. The production also provided each crew member with aluminum refillable water bottles to cut down on the use of plastic bottles and paper cups. Water was readily available on set for cast and crew to fill their personal water bottles.

NICE PAD -- Kermit’s mansion was filmed at Greystone Mansion in Beverly Hills.

OUI, OUI -- Miss Piggy’s Vogue Paris office was filmed at the Pink Palace mansion in Bel Air.

GO BIG -- Tex Richman's 51st Floor office was shot in the old ARCO headquarters on Figueroa Street in downtown LA.

MAKING MUPPET STUDIOS -- The Muppet Theater, built on Stage 28 on the Universal Studios Lot, incorporated parts of the old “Phantom of the Opera” set into its audience section.
• The Jim Henson Company gate was turned into the Muppet Studios entrance. A sign showcased a series of tour attractions, along with their sad fates:
 Fozzie's Joke Room: Closed
 Gonzo's Cannonade: Closed for Repair
 Rowlf's Music Parlor: Under Renovation
 Dr. Honeydew's Laboratory of Fun: Out of Order

TRICKY TOUR -- Walter's tour through Muppet Studios actually went through The Jim Henson Company on La Brea, Crossroads of the World on Sunset Blvd., the outside of Stage 3 on the Disney Lot in Burbank, two soundstage sets on the Universal Lot (Kermit's Office and the Muppet Theater interior).

SIGNATURE ARCHES -- A set design replicating the arches from the opening title sequence of “The Muppet Show” was recreated and used in the Muppet telethon.


THEY’VE GOT CHARACTER
RIBET – Kermit the Frog first appeared on “Afternoon, Footlight Theater” and “Sam and Friends” in 1955.
• A balloon of Kermit appears annually in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade.
• Kermit has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
• Kermit celebrated his 50th Anniversary in Kermit, Texas, in 2005 and received a key to the city.

PROMINENT PIG – Miss Piggy first appeared in the chorus on “The Herb Alpert Special” in 1974.
• She appeared as 1st Sow in the “Return to the Planet of The Pigs” bit on “The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence” in 1975 (which was, in effect, the pilot for “The Muppet Show”).
• She was also a chorus pig in the first season of “The Muppet Show.” Her break-out performance was in a number called “Temptation” on the Juliet Prowse episode.
• The confident character was called Miss Piggy for the first time on “The Muppet Show” in 1976.

MAKING HIS DEBUT -- Walter was a character conceptualized by Jason Segel specifically for Disney’s “The Muppets.”

THE GREAT – Gonzo first appeared in “The Great Santa Claus Switch” as the Cigar Box Frackle in 1970.
• He appeared on “The Herb Alpert Special” in 1974.
• Gonzo as he’s now known debuted on “The Muppet Show” in 1976.

WOCKA WOCKA – Fozzie first appeared on “The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence” in 1975.

TOP DAWG – Rowlf first appeared on for a Purina Dog Chow commercial in 1962.
• He began appearances on “The Jimmy Dean Show” in 1963.

HECKLERS -- Statler & Waldorf first heckled on “The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence” in 1975.

STAR-SPANGLED -- Sam the Eagle first was offended and appalled by the Muppets on “The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence” in 1975.

PRE-HEATED -- The Swedish Chef kicked off his cooking career on “The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence” in 1975.

RAT-A-TAT -- Rizzo the Rat originally appeared as an uncredited vermin in “The Muppets Musicians of Bremen” in 1972.
• He was revamped by Steve Whitmire for “The Muppet Show” sometime between 1978 and 1980, and credited as Rizzo the Rat for the first time in 1981’s “The Great Muppet Caper.”

IT’S ELECTRIC -- The Electric Mayhem, including Dr. Teeth, Animal, Janice, Floyd and Zoot, launched their legendary career on “The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence” in 1975.






ABOUT THE MOVIE
On vacation in Los Angeles, Walter, the world's biggest Muppet fan, his brother Gary (Jason Segel) and Gary’s girlfriend Mary (Amy Adams) from Smalltown, USA, discover the nefarious plan of oilman Tex Richman (Chris Cooper) to raze the Muppet Theater and drill for the oil recently discovered beneath the Muppets' former stomping grounds. To stage a telethon and raise the $10 million needed to save the theater, Walter, Mary and Gary help Kermit reunite the Muppets, who have all gone their separate ways: Fozzie now performs with a Reno casino tribute band called the Moopets, Miss Piggy is a plus-size fashion editor at Vogue Paris, Animal is in a Santa Barbara clinic for anger management, and Gonzo is a high-powered plumbing magnate. With secret, signature, celebrity cameos, Disney’s “The Muppets” hits the big screen Nov. 23, 2011.

Fiction Friday: Two Writing Books To Add To Your Collection

I am very excited to recommend two new writing books!

The first one is a book that you can read a little bit every day. If you've heard of (or done) NaNoWriMo this book is the guidebook for how to make writing a novel in a month actually happen. It's not just "You can do it!" it's "Here's how to do it!"

Write-A-Thon: Write Your Book In 26 Days (And Live To Tell About It) by Rachelle Melander

Find the focus, energy, and drive you need to start--and finish--your book

According to a recent survey, 81 percent of Americans want to write a book. But finding free time to write can be difficult for Americans. According to Gallup's annual lifestyle poll, 60% of working Americans say that do not have time to do what they want to do.

So many would-be authors start writing only to stall out due to writer's block, mental fatigue, and other challenges. Write-A-Thon helps you overcome those stumbling blocks and complete your book once and for all. And you don't have to type away for years on end. Here's a plan that will help you write your book--in twenty-six days!

Write-A-Thon gives you the tools, advice, and inspiration you need to succeed before, during, and after your writing race. Solid instruction, positive psychology, and inspiration from marathon runners will give you the momentum to take each step from here to the finish line.

*Start out well prepared: Learn how to train your attitude, your writing, and your life -- and plan your novel or nonfiction book.
*Maintain your pace: Get advice and inspiration to stay motivated and keep writing.
*Bask in your accomplishment: Find the best ways to recover and move forward once the marathon is over and you have a completed manuscript in hand.

Writing a book in twenty-six days may seem impossible--especially if you don't write full time--but in Write-A-Thon, Rochelle Melander will teach you the life skills, performance techniques, and writing tools you need to finish your manuscript in less than a month--guaranteed!

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This next book is from a writer I've been following on YouTube for awhile. So when I found out she was creating a "how-to" book on plotting, I knew I had to get my hands on it. If you want to learn to plot, this resource is a wonderful overview with details any writer can benefit from. Here's what it's about:

The Plot Whisperer: Secrets of Storytelling Any Writer Can Master by Martha Alderson


When it comes to writing bestsellers, it's all about the plot. Trouble is, plot is where most writers fall down--but you don't have to be one of them. With this book, you'll learn how to create stories that build suspense, reveal character, and engage readers--one scene at a time.
Celebrated writing teacher and author Martha Alderson has devised a plotting system that's as innovative as it is easy to implement. With her foolproof blueprint, you'll learn to devise a successful storyline for any genre. She shows how to:

Use the power of the Universal Story
Create plot lines and subplots that work together
Effectively use a scene tracker for maximum impact
Insert energetic markers at the right points in your story
Show character transformation at the book's climax
This is the ultimate guide for you to write page-turners that sell!

Book Review: The Names Of God Bible And Giveaway!

This Bible is perfect for that a good friend who loves to study the Bible or a special woman who has influenced you in your own walk. This hardback edition is FILLED with resources to keep her digging into the Word all through 2012! Maybe you could get one for yourself and one for a friend and give it to her with a giftcard to Starbucks and a promise to meet regularly to talk over what you're learning. That's a gift that truly keeps on giving!

Since this Bible is truly filled with information, I decided to go ahead and post the write-up that the publisher did-- because otherwise I wouldn't do it justice. This new resource is one to check out for someone else... or put it on your wish list for yourself! :)

One of the best ways to get to know God on a deeper level is to know the names and titles both he and his people give to him. Now the bestselling author of Praying the Names of God reveals the richness of God's character and love found in his names. The Names of God Bible restores more than 10,000 occurrences of specific names of God--like Yahweh, El Shadday, El Elyon, and Adonay--to help readers

Discover the Hebrew names of God within the biblical text
Understand the meaning and significance of each name
Encounter God in a new way through prayers, promises, and devotional readings

Perfect for personal study, prayer, and reflection, The Names of God Bible includes these special features

more than 10,000 names and titles of God restored to their Hebrew equivalent and printed in brown ink to stand out within the biblical text
Names of God Reading Paths lead readers to the next reference of the name so they can pray the names of God throughout Scripture
Name Pages feature
- background information associated with 68 names and titles of God
- key Scripture passages in which the meaning is revealed
- devotional readings on each of the featured names
- specific Bible promises connected to each of the featured names
introductions to each book of the Bible highlight the main themes and list the names and titles that appear in that book
300 callouts highlight key Scripture for memorization and reflection
Calling God by Name sidebars shed light on the relationship between biblical people and the specific names they called God
topical prayer guide, pronunciation guide, name index, and Bible reading plans to assist in study

Anyone who desires a deeper understanding of God and new insights into the Bible will cherish The Names of God Bible as it opens a door into the Hebrew roots of the faith and the Scriptures.

But wait, there's more! I am giving away one copy of this Bible! Please leave a comment and make sure I can reach you if you win. I will announce the winner on this post next Monday!

COMMENTS ARE NOW CLOSED. A WINNER HAS BEEN CHOSEN AND NOTIFIED.