My Promised Post

I promised myself I'd get on here this week and write a post. Just one post. Something shared from my life, preferably some wise observation that would bring about meaning and perspective to the chaotic and frenzied state we call daily life.

Obviously that didn't happen.

I struggled with what to tell you because I haven't had any particularly wise or reflective thoughts lately. If I got on here and wrote something, the stuff I would tell you about would be random and unrelated.

For instance, I could tell you that I still subscribe to magazines in the hopes that I will someday make time to read them and clip the recipes. But instead they get together and reproduce in a stack on my nightstand.

It's not that bad... but it could be.

I could tell you that my beautiful summer centerpiece I created for my dining room table is still sitting there even though we are well into September because 1) I am not in the mood to go climbing around in the attic to get out my fall stuff and 2) I'm still hanging onto summer. Parting is such sweet sorrow. And also? We've had the best weather of the summer in the last two weeks.

I could tell you that the other day I bought all my groceries for the week in 45 minutes and this is the fastest I can ever remember getting through that particular task. But then I was waylaid by the world's slowest cashier and watched in agony as she moved at a snail's pace, scanning and then bagging each item as the minutes ticked by and my children's school got out and I nearly had a panic attack. My kids have this thing about being picked up on time. I bought them Snickers bars and Sparkling Ice waters to make up for it-- I am not beyond a little bribe reward when circumstances call for it.

If these are bad for us, please don't tell us. We love them and I feel better treating my kids to these instead of soda.

I could tell you that this was one of those weeks that I struggled with feeling like I will never be smart or capable or talented enough to write what I want to write. I hate when those feelings come along, but I suspect they do for everyone at times. I'm not real sure how to handle them when they come along, except to pray for wisdom to see the truth and talk to trusted friends who will listen to you gripe, then set you straight. My husband and my best friend do an excellent job in this department.

I could tell you that I listened to HELP THANKS WOW by Anne Lamott this week on audio and just loved it. I was surprised by how much I loved it, actually. And how much it helped with the aforementioned writing struggles. While I'm not in lockstep with all her views, I do love her writing and have consistently through the years.

I could tell you that I'm doing really well with my healthy eating plan. I've lost some weight and I feel good. I'm sleeping better and have more energy. Mostly what I'm doing is shifting my brain to a full-blown lifestyle change, looking at eating this way all the time, with occasional treats. This has been good for me.

I could tell you that my oldest is at Naval Reserve basic training right now and we won't hear from him for 4 weeks and how any other time I'd tell you that four weeks is nothing but, turns out, when you're waiting to hear from your kid, it is.

 

I could tell you that my stepdad had hip replacement surgery and my mom had a health scare this week. And that when I talked to her about it I was all positive and encouraging but later, when I went on a walk with my husband, I confessed how scared it made me and then we talked about what it means to be part of the Sandwich Generation-- caring for aging parents while dealing with young adult children--and how, boutabing, we have landed in it. Weren't we just young parents struggling to pay for diapers and encountering far too many sleepless nights like a minute ago?

My mom and stepdad are both doing fine so yay for that!

I could tell you that this weekend there are so many things I could use the time to do. So. Many. But when I woke up this morning, I knew that scrambling around trying to do all those things was the exact worst thing I could do. So I'm going to do nothing this weekend except read. Maybe take a walk. Spend time with my husband watching HOMELAND (which is not a show I would recommend to anyone because there is a lot of cussing and even some nudity and yet, we are hooked). Go to a birthday party for my mother in law. Go to church (and repent for watching HOMELAND). Rest. Journal. Breathe.

Grace. I need it.

And maybe think of something great that I can share with you next week. But don't count on it.