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Saturday, February 09, 2008

How To Avoid Running


1. Complain that it is too cold outside.

2. Excuse yourself from doing so because your older children are in school and can't listen out for the baby while she is napping and you are on your run. Tell yourself, your mom, your friends, and your husband (especially your husband) that you simply can't be expected to run any other time. Lament over what you are going to do as the months slip by one by one.

3. If one day it is pretty mild outside and your older children happen to be home sick, admit that there are no more excuses and determine that today you are going for it! Then go around the rest of the day wondering if maybe your chest feels a little tight and perhaps you shouldn't push it because you might be getting what the kids have. Dodge the bullet for one more day.

4. If the next day you still have not come down with anything and your kids are home and the weather is nice again, determine there is no more stalling allowed. Decide that you will go running... later.

5. Edit the blog post you wrote 15 times.

6. Pull ingredients out for dinner.

7. Switch laundry from the washer to the dryer. Fold the load that was in the dryer.

8. Hunt around for the missing headphones to your Ipod. Tell yourself that it is not your fault if you can't find them and you don't have to go because running without music is just about impossible.

9. Pause by the monitor when the baby coughs in her sleep and wonder if maybe you shouldn't leave, because she might wake up while you are gone.

10. Stand around in the kitchen and stare at the minutes ticking by on the microwave clock. Realize that now you have dawdled long enough that you only have enough time to run, come home, jump in the car and head to the carpool line to pick up your other children. Think about how gross that is. Consider not going at all. Then remember the last time you stood on the scale. And run out the door.
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3 comments:

Wrinkled Shirt Ministries said...

Marybeth,
This cracked me up. I've been there for so long. But let me tell ya...I am not teaching 5 fitness classes a week at two local gyms. I know it's a huge commitment but it's the only way I could be held accountable for getting back on track and getting my hubby in the gym (for free). I am so excited because I've been doing this for three weeks and yesterday I was able to put on a pair of jeans that I haven't been able to wear in almost two years. And what's even better is that I'm getting paid to work out. For the first time in a long time I feel as if I'm right where God wants me. He sends amazing women to my classes everyday and I get to encourage them and assist them in living healthier lives. So just think about those jeans girl, get out there and run!

Wrinkled Shirt Ministries said...

okay, wish I could go back and edit my comment. Proof reading is so important. In that second sentence I meant to say, "I am NOW teaching 5 classes." Aspiring writer at work :P

Simple Family Supper lady said...

I love your list!
I don't run, but I do have a bike I need to ride...... Excuses are so easy for me! I do tend to have a procrastination issue! Thanks for the laugh... I am not alone!
Heather