Comments on Cheaper By The Half Dozen: Teenagers And Cell Phones

We don't let our kids have cell phones until they ...

2008-07-30T11:46:00.000-04:00

We don't let our kids have cell phones until they are in college. While in high school, if they go somewhere on their own, they take mine with them in case of emergencies. My cell phone is very dull, boring and highly uncool but I don't care!

My ten year old came home from his private Christi...

2008-05-20T16:16:00.000-04:00

My ten year old came home from his private Christian school, having seen a video of a couple having sex on an older boy's cell phone - he was showing all they boys in his little brother's class.

Aparrently he downloaded it directly to his cell phone, as it was a sophisticated model.

So, unsavoury text messages are not the worst thing that can happen to your child and they don't even need a cell phone to participate.

Unsupervised conversation and texting is the thin edge of the wedge.

What a joy to hear other moms who want to do the r...

2008-05-20T12:17:00.000-04:00

What a joy to hear other moms who want to do the right thing!

We have twin boys who are almost 13. They have asked for cell phones but to no avail. There are too many chances we'd be taking. They already have seen boys in the bathroom at school passing around a picture of a naked girl ON a boy's cell.

We also would not be able to control what is texted to them or what pictures they might recieve unwillingly. That is too risky if you ask me.

As parents, we need to be proactive and always aware of what is happening in society in order to protect our own kids.

Stand tall and fight for what is right!

Thank you for this post! I agree 100% and am goin...

2008-03-27T14:17:00.000-04:00

Thank you for this post! I agree 100% and am going to send this link to my friends with teens. I just found your blog and am really enjoying it!
Blessings, Dee
www.homeschoolblogger.com/boysrus

My 8 year old daughter asked me the other day when...

2008-03-27T10:17:00.000-04:00

My 8 year old daughter asked me the other day when she can have a cell phone. Many of her friends at school already have one. Eight years old! I could not believe it!
This has given me lots to think about, not that I was considering her request, but your post gives me grounds to deny the whole technology thing for alot longer anyway.

Amen, sister! I do not have teenagers, but I know...

2008-03-26T22:29:00.000-04:00

Amen, sister! I do not have teenagers, but I know I will be there sooner than later. I love you and your husbands ideas on parenting. I even forward your hubby's blog post about parenting to my hubby. It was very good to read.

Praying for you sister. I'm not looking forward to these kinds of things that you are dealing with.

Hope your foot is better!

Hi Marybeth,Excellent post! My almost 16 year old...

2008-03-26T18:58:00.000-04:00

Hi Marybeth,
Excellent post! My almost 16 year old son has had a cell phone for a year, but thankfully, so far, he has only used it for calling home, and he has not given his cell phone number out to anyone so all his "regular" calls come to our home. We told him when we purchased it for him it was an "emergency" phone only...and we would continue to pay for the service as long as that was ALL it was used for while he had it. Another plus is the fact that he hates to talk on the phone ANY TIME so, at least for now, things are good. However, I'm not naive enough to think problems can't arise. Thanks for the warnings and advice.
Hope your foot is healing.
Blessings,
Joy

Hi Marybeth,This makes me crazy too: Where we liv...

2008-03-26T18:12:00.000-04:00

Hi Marybeth,
This makes me crazy too: Where we live not only are teens carrying cell phones but many of my 10 yr. old's friends have them. I think some of it is laziness (or craziness) on the part of the parent and some of it is just plain spoiling a kid in giving them the latest gadget. Most of the kids around here not only have a phone but a "top of the line" phone.

Our oldest 4 kids have cell phones but they are required to pay the monthly fee and replace the phone should it get wet, or lost....(this has happened more than once).

And you are right about checking the texts for info. My 17 yr. old son got into trouble a few weeks back and tried to lie his way out of it. However, when I took his phone and read his text messages the truth was revealed. (I felt a little like a CSI investigator,lol).

UH OH. THis message is gettig way too long. Just stay strong and know that no matter what they say, not all parents are caving to the pressure of what "every one else is doing!"

Kelley
ps. Thanks for adding me to your blogroll, I can't wait to meet you at the conference this summer!

Marybeth,I am sending this post to every mom and d...

2008-03-26T17:42:00.000-04:00

Marybeth,

I am sending this post to every mom and dad of teens that I know!!!!! You have empowered me!

I hope your foot is feeling a little better! I so feel for you. I know how hard it is.

Thanks for this message today.
Love you,
Melissa

My daughter is almost 12, so I am beginning to fee...

2008-03-26T17:13:00.000-04:00

My daughter is almost 12, so I am beginning to feel the pain of teenagerhood. Ummmm, not likin' it!

I don't care for cell phones either. I have one myself but everyone who knows me knows it's pointless to call it.

Not sure yet what my position will be when she gets older. Glad I read your post so I can start thinking about it.

I like your position on cell phones! :-) I actuall...

2008-03-26T16:58:00.000-04:00

I like your position on cell phones! :-) I actually hate the way even adults use them. Unless I'm expecting an important call back, I rarely answer when I am with someone.

At Christmas, I was at a friend's house. We were playing a card came. Her 19-year-old got a call and it was his turn to play. He managed it but stayed on the line and then it came around to him again. He decided his conversation (with all of us listening) was more important. Sigh. I lost it and grabbed a card out of his hand and played for him!

Cell phones are good for connecting but not at the expense of connecting with those before your eyes!

Wonderful post! I have a pre-schooler, so we are a...

2008-03-26T16:08:00.000-04:00

Wonderful post! I have a pre-schooler, so we are a long way from cellphones. I agree with Patty's comment. I think parents have to monitor and provide guidance for cellphone and internet use. I formerly worked in law enforcement and have a weekly column (Safety Saturdays) on my blog about keeping kids safe online and offline. Check out my last post, and click on the Safety Saturdays label in the left column to see all the tips. I hope you find the information informative and useful.

Great discussion.My daughter is a 4th grader and a...

2008-03-26T13:02:00.000-04:00

Great discussion.

My daughter is a 4th grader and already asking about cell phones. I do see the value in an older child having one, but I myself didn't even get one until about 5 or 6 years ago!! Yes, there was always a phone around I could use if there was an emergency.

I agree kids shouldn't have cell phones. My cousi...

2008-03-26T11:41:00.000-04:00

I agree kids shouldn't have cell phones. My cousin's daughter got a cell phone when she became a freshman in h.s. Shortly after, I received a very disturbing threat - very specific on my cell phone. When we tracked it down, it was my cousin's daughters cell phone. They brushed it off as kids being kids and being bored, but my husband and I thought it was very serious. She's a great kids, but never saw the consequences of her actions. I work at a criminal law firm and the threat was specific enough we were concerned. So in short, my thoughts - kids shouldn't have cell phones, and if they do, there are plenty of options to limit use for those I.C.E. situations.

Sadly in today's society, even great kids, should be watched - not suffocated, but guided. And I believe not only do parents have to think about cell phones, but also the internet - IM's, facebook, blogs, myspace, etc. It's not a matter of being paranoid, it's just being careful and wise.

There's a balance in there somewhere. ;-) And if a kid does get these privileges, I don't think there's anything wrong with being aware.

Great post!

I just happened upon your blog for the first time ...

2008-03-26T10:46:00.000-04:00

I just happened upon your blog for the first time and I will definitely be back. Great post and definitely a subject that needs to be addressed. I agree, sometimes we allow things just to avoid an arguement. That is so not good parenting. I have learned that my kids tend to appreciate having some boundaries.I think it gives them a sense of security.
A side note, your family picture is beautiful.

None of my kids have cell phones, but your point a...

2008-03-26T09:41:00.000-04:00

None of my kids have cell phones, but your point applies to SO many areas of parenting! Thank you for giving me much to think about...I am also guilty of taking the path of least resistance, far too often.

Nice to meet you too, Marybeth! Oooh, I'd love to ...

2008-03-25T23:43:00.000-04:00

Nice to meet you too, Marybeth! Oooh, I'd love to read your book! Let me know if you want to do a book swap.

Can't wait to check out all these P31 blogs. See you in June!!

Our 11 year old granddaughter came over to spend t...

2008-03-25T23:00:00.000-04:00

Our 11 year old granddaughter came over to spend the night New Years Eve and brought her cell phone and was texting her mom (or that's what she said, it could have been friends, we didn't know!) most of the evening while we were watching movies, eating dinner, etc...I finally asked her to turn it off and put it away just so we could visit without the distraction of it...it was new to her, but I found it to be really annoying. I guess I'm old school but we all got along fine back in the day in the 70's w/o cell phones and texting....my prayers to you all with teens and pre-teens, it's a tough world out there for them for sure!

My oldest does have a phone, but only because we w...

2008-03-25T18:27:00.000-04:00

My oldest does have a phone, but only because we were upgraded and let her have the old one. We don't have texting though. The problem is people still text her - but I am checking it all the time. My motto is trust no one. :-)Hee hee! J/K - sort of. It's just I am nosy and want to know what is going on - Too many parents aren't nosy enough! Great post.

My kids aren't of this age yet but your post has c...

2008-03-25T17:24:00.000-04:00

My kids aren't of this age yet but your post has certainly given me a lot to think about. Your viewpoint is so refreshing! Thank you.

Laura

Great thoughts as my daughter has been begging for...

2008-03-25T16:53:00.000-04:00

Great thoughts as my daughter has been begging for a cell phone for her birthday next month. The kids actually have one cell phone between them, but it's old as the hills and only for use in emergencies and such. They are too embarrassed to even show it to anyone because it's really that old. You've given us more to think about before we make our decision on her request.

I have also been victim of the teenage cell phone ...

2008-03-25T16:44:00.000-04:00

I have also been victim of the teenage cell phone problem. I have 2 teenagers, my son is 16, my daughter is 15. Honestly, my daughter very rarely uses her phone. She doesn't have a lot of friends outside of family. She is a very private person, and most often calls me, my sister, or my mom. My son, on the other hand, is everyone's friend. His phone is always in his hand. If he is not talking on it then he is texting. I haven't gotten to the point of completely taking it away but I am beginning to feel as if it will be necessary. The only thing is I really want him to have access to a phone in case he has an accident while driving. What to do? I wish I had as much courage as you do.

I happened upon your blog while visiting another! ...

2008-03-25T15:26:00.000-04:00

I happened upon your blog while visiting another! :)

What a wonderful post... I am sending this along to all my friends w/ kids. I have not been able to have children, so sometimes I think it's easier for me to see outside the box. (sometimes) I also have nieces who I am very close to, and they share a lot w/ me. I know the goings on of even the good kids. I have always told them - what they tell me is in confidence unless I feel they are in danger etc - then I go to mom and dad! ;)

I heard a program last year on Moody Bible Radio regarding computers and the internet. It hit me when the commentator spoke of the days when we were younger, had a handful of friends, our parents knew our friends as well as the parents of our friends. With the internet network - kids these days have hundreds of "friends" .
I commend you dear sister for standing up for what is right, true and safe for you children!

Bless you for speaking out!

If it makes you feel any better, I am not a popula...

2008-03-25T14:44:00.000-04:00

If it makes you feel any better, I am not a popular mom where cell phones are concerned. They do not get one until they are 16 AND driving. So far, only one child has a cell phone and he is now 19. Texting was only added after a year and then it was a minimal amount. This was more for my convenience than his. If I needed to remind him of an appt, I could send him a text. My 14yo knows that there are enough people around with phones that he can call me if he needs to. I have to know where he is so I can get in touch with him if I need to. When he goes somewhere with a friend, I am sure to get the parents' number as well as the child's. They also do not appreciate the fact that when their friends call, they do not get to lock themselves in the bedroom and talk. They have to talk in the kitchen or dining room. My parents "got" to listen in on my conversations and I do the same thing with mine. You are right in knowing that they need us to be in their business whether they want us to be or not. Just my thoughts.